NewParents Receive Abnormal Results of Medical Test: NewBaby is Abnormally Cute

We kept this one a secret from almost all of you, but NewMom and I have been sitting on pins and needles for a while. (NOTE: Everything is fine now. You can start breathing again.) You see, it all started back in the delivery room. NewBaby had just arrived and both parents were busy erasing everything out of their appointment books for the next 18 years. Enter the doctor, busy with all the post-birth stuff that goes on. Just like the car mechanic taking apart your transmission, the doctor said, "Hmmm. This doesn't look right." He was referring to the umbilical cord, which was shown during a lab examination to have only one artery carrying blood to/from NewBaby (known as Single Umbilical Artery, or SUA). I confess at this point to not having known that most babies have two arteries in their umbilical cords. My thoughts at the time were something like "Zero is bad, so one is good, right?" Enter NewBaby, still slightly gunky but 100% cute, and all thoughts of worry were gone for the next 96 hours.

Enter NewBaby's pediatrician, who upon hearing the diagnosis of SUA ordered an ultrasound of various body parts. In reading the various pages out there on the internet about SUA, it seems we escaped the more dramatic effects. Most babies born with SUA are completely normal, but it is associated with many more dramatic problems. Maybe I was trying to be overly hopeful, but a statistics lesson came back to me then...Correlation is not necessarily causation. If I am wrong about that, that SUA does actually cause defects instead of just occurring alongside them, I really do not want to know.

The ultrasound last week was to rule out any kidney/bladder problems. We got the results today, and apparently Evan is fine except for one thing. His kidneys are abnormally cute. We will be posting pictures of the cutest kidneys ever, but we will limit it to our refrigerator door. We figure that the one umbilical artery he did have must have been honkin' huge.

Now that that's out of the way, we are happy to report that NewBaby Evan is plumping up quickly. He is sporting a double chin and his arms and legs are developing a healthy layer of baby fat. How well he sleeps at night varies, but we're pretty sure that we're on the better end of that continuum. NewDad got lots of sleep during the past two weeks while NewAunt Elizabeth and NewUncle Joshua were here and took the monitor between feedings. They also cooked up a storm while they were in town. Their 1.75 year old son, NewCousin Benjamin, gave us lessons on how to toddler-proof a house.

Minor disasters have been few and far between. There has been some spitting up, but nothing major yet. Gas comes and goes. Thank goodness for whoever invented the baby gas medicine drops. In closing, both parents have gone through a rite of passage no one bothered to tell us about...being urinated on during diaper changes. NewMom hasn't been so fortunate, but I have been lucky enough to escape being pooped on so far. My diaper-changing speed has increased exponentially after the experience with #1. At least NewBaby isn't old enough to be able to gurgle and laugh after the fact.

Sleep is Good; Lots of Sleep is Great

To mark his one-week birthday, Evan gave his parents a most needed gift -- sleep. NewDad chalked up 9 hours in a 12 hour period, and NewMom got quite a bit too, although more interrupted for feedings. NewWatchDog Darwin got lots of sleep too, but he could sleep through a train wreck and not wake up. Some of you have been asking about the pets...Darwin is handling the transition easily, but still looks concerned when Evan is crying. Heidi (our cat) tries to avoid the whole affair, but shows signs of interest when she thinks we're not looking. Ginger (our other dog) spends most of her time outside, and hasn't really had a chance to meet the baby much. She's a bit hyper. Before anyone says it, all the animals are kept away from Evan if we aren't in the room. Evan's door is closed and Heidi is evicted from the nursery if Evan is in his crib. I love that cat, but she would be moving somewhere else if I ever found her in the crib with Evan.

As a humble NewDad, I want to thank each and every one of you for checking out the blog and for your enthusiastic feedback. I am wrestling with some issues that I think every blogger and NewDad goes through. One, how much information do people really want? To that end, the blog is going back to a slower posting style...maybe once a week or so for a while. The birth/hospital stay sped things up for a while, and I apologize if I overloaded your inbox with emails. At least I wasn't sending 50 MB of pictures directly to your inbox for you to download over a dial-up connection. =) The second issue is how much do you really want to keep up with this? Some of you are coming b/c you get my update email when it goes out. Others are getting forwarded emails (what, you don't forward this to everyone you know?). Still others are finding this site through other means. I hate to be that person at work who forwards everything to you, even the silly "deadly spiders in the bananas from Costa Rica" stories...so if in my enthusiasm over the whole pregnancy thing, I added you to the list but you want off...let me know. I promise not to take it too personally. If you're not on the list but want to be on, email me at guarding24-blogs@yahoo.com . That will go to my main account and I'll add you on. I only send a text email when an update is posted, so it won't blow out your inbox. The last issue is the size of the blog. I've changed the format so that only the last few posts are displayed. That makes the page load faster, especially if you're on dialup. All of the old posts are available by clicking the links on the right hand side of the page.

Thanks for your support of this NewDad/Blogger as he tries to figure out this new world of adventures. You should know that I just had a major typo as I brushed across the keyboard, and interestingly enough it spelled "poopf." A sign to get off the blog and check a diaper? You decide.